Something I have learned in the past few days...

So being home alone with Tav I have been spending alot of time cleaning my house and talking to new friends, old friends and family online. So much is going on in life for my friends, family and me that its hard to keep track of it all but one thing is for sure "Why does some one get jealous of another?"

Jesse and I have two people in our life that are going through a hard time right now. One is having issues with there love life and will be single again. The other one is looking back at there life wishing they had done the things they wanted to do but made the choice to have a family instead. However out of the two of them they are jealous of me.

The one who is having issues is jealous because I got a loving, wonderful husband and a handsome little boy. The other one is jealous of me because I did not get married to my husband till I was 27 and just started having my family at the age of 28. Funny thing is I am jealous of them too.

The one who is having issues is about to get there single life back and I miss mine. So I am jealous of the fact that she can come and go as she pleases but I would not trade my husband or son for anything. As for the other one who is jealous of how long I waited to have my family, I am jealous of them because they started at a young age because it was easy for them to find the one they were ment for.

I did not by choice wait to get married and start my family. I just waited for some one who would love me for me and I love them the same. That is why I got married at 27 and I always wanted a baby but wanted to be married so I waited till I was married for a baby. Which I did not expect for us to get pregnant so soon. I figured it would take some time. Boy was I wrong but I love my boys alot and I am blessed to have them.

So what if I can not come and go as I please any more. I got to guys who love me alot. One who made the choice and the other I brought in to this crazy world. So I am glad that I had to wait till later in life for my family because I got some one who really cares about me. Even if I get the feeling like he doesn't at times, he still does love me. It's all part of life but one thing I have learned in the past few days is that we all get jealous over some one for some reason or another.

The key to it is to remember what you got and who loves you. That and who is what matters most. Jealousy just grows too big if you sit and let it. It can be a good thing but only if you don't let it take control of your life. It helps to keep a spark of love in your life because it helps your special some one know that you care a great deal about them. However if you just sit and let it grow you get jealous of every one and every thing and that is not healthy. But I am just glad I can be jealous a little and let it go.

I will let go of the fact that I am jealous of these two because one is free to do as they please and the other one is set in there family. I maybe jealous of things about them but I am very happy with what I got!! Thats what matters most being happy with what I got and who I am.

Which I am still trying to figure out who I am now a days. I mean between my husband, son and the Marine Corp I have no time for me any more. Or so it seems. Since my husband has been deployed I have been able to clean the house and do somethings that I use to do before Tav came along. So I have been finding a little of me and I hope that soon I will know the new me.

Thats all I am doing is growing and changing. Something we all do every day. We are all learning something new and changing. It's not always a drastic change but there is a change every day of our lives. Well I think I have gone on enough with my thoughts for today. Until the next time...Later people!!